Burnin' Health

So...I had intended to write a really nice and poignant post about being in Japan on the 70th anniversary of Pearl Harbor, but I couldn't come up with anything that fit the bill. It was a rather unspectacular day here in Japan. I went to get my yearly health check (more on that later). That night, we had our English society as well. I will say that in attendance at that meeting was an 82-year-old woman who would have been 11 when Japan entered the war with the U.S. My grandfather was a bomber in WW2 in the Pacific, and yet here we are, 70 years after the fact, speaking as friends in Japan. It's funny how the world works right? 

I have been reading a book for a while on the history of D-Day. I have a tremendous level of respect for veterans of all wars, but especially for those of World War 2. I can't imagine fighting a war under those conditions. It is moving to read the stories of bravery, brotherhood and sacrifice. I am extraordinarily proud to be an American, but I am even more proud of the goodness in people to resolve conflict after the fact and come together. I believe me living in Japan is a testament to that. 

 Health time! I went to get my annual checkup and they do it differently than we do in the U.S. It is actually more like a book fair than a health check. They pull up a bunch of busses that have the different stations for health. They had an X-ray bus, a CAT scan bus and all sorts of stuff.

 I snapped this picture of the eye test station. Getting a health check in Japan was a harrowing experience for me. Evidently I was supposed to bring my urine sample already prepared...I neglected to do so, and found myself standing in line with a cup of pee with other people watching me. They organize it a lot like a buffet, you just go from station to station. After the urine sample test (which I guess I passed), I went to the lady who asks you a bunch of medical questions. Answering medical questions is significantly more stressful when you are can't speak the language. She asked me something about hospital (the only word I know) and blood. I said no to both. She also asked me about su-pee-do gohan, which translates (I think) to speed food. I don't know if she was asking me if I ate food while on speed, or how fast I ate my food. I just said yes and waited. 

When they took my blood pressure, they saw that it was pretty high. I can't imagine why... The lady administering told me to relax and it came down by 20 points. I saw about 3 other people who asked me to lift up my shirt about 3 times, and took my blood. I am not a doctor, but I am sure that the lady who took my blood was not qualified because it hurt really bad!

 I snapped this as I was walking away. Bus number 2 is where they did the ECG. I knew this was an EchoCardioGram, but it might as well have been in Japanese. I went in, laid down, and they put suction cups on my chest and heart monitors on. Evidently I passed because they let me go in the end. I also got a chest x-ray. They had me go in the back of the bus and hug this thing that took an x-ray of my chest. The doctor showed me the picture, and it looked good (to me).

Little funny thing I had today. We were talking about whether or not it was good for Junior high students to have cell phones. I caught this little tidbit that one of the students wrote. "it is emergency for us to noise." I think the student was just putting out all of the English words they knew, because the other two were really coherent.

Tuesday is a Different Kind of Day

Most days go by with relatively little to write about...today was not that day. i don't know what the stars were aligning to do, but today had about 3 or 4 blog-worthy things happen (blog-worthy being a loose term). To start, I was in my small elementary school. After my first class, I saw that all the students were unnecessarily orderly out on the playground. After investigating, I was told that they were playing dodgeball! Dodgeball is evidently one of those things that has transcended national boundaries. There were some twists to make it convenient for playing on a field, but it was dodgeball alright. 

3rd and 4th graders competing ferociously for the glory of being the All Akita Elementary School champions.

The 1st and 2nd graders played a little different variant. I didn't catch the good stuff, but here is the end. They played in a circle. Circle of Death. Maru (Japanese for circle) Muerte (Spanish for death). Tri-lingual name game here. 

I taught a Christmas lesson to the 4th graders today. Upon reviewing the list of Christmas words, I realized how difficult it is to explain Christmas-y things. Think about stockings...socks...that you hang on the fire until candy comes. I didn't do a good job of clarifying it for them, but what can you do? I ate lunch with the 4th graders, and they asked me if I knew about chapurin. They meant Charlie Chaplin, I discerned this from the mustache, hat and cane imitation. As lunch was winding down, I was folding up my milk carton when a funny thing happened. I left the straw in, and as the air exited the carton, I launched a stream of leftover milk into the air about 7 feet. I immediately laughed and looked around to see if anyone else saw. There was one little girl with wide eyes that was laughing along with me, the other 12 students had no idea. 

In my 5th grade class, we played a game of charades. I let the kids choose their own names in English. These were the best that they could come up with. Team Fairy and Team Angels. The class is 60% boys. 

 You can see that I awarded Team Angels 10,000 points. I don't really remember what it was for. 

 I went to a discount grocery store while I was waiting to meet some people. The store is called Trial...perhaps because it is like a super-packed dollar store. In other words, it's like every Asian market in Chinatown across the world. In any case, they had Natural Hardwood Smoked Bacon. Nice right? I figured it was worth a shot. It actually tasted like regular bacon if you cooked it and left it on the country until it got cold. Not too shabby for Japan! 

 Another seeming by-product of America. I don't think I have ever seen corn this giant. 

 In the beer aisle, I found this. Now I am no expert, but this seems a little small for a beer...am I right? 

This picture pretty much sums up everything you need to know about Trial Bargain Store.

Parade and Costume Party

Today as I was going to church, I saw three things of interest. The first was all the new snow on Mt. Fuji. The snow is getting lower and lower on the mountains. This picture doesn't do it any justice, but the mountain looked awesome. As somewhat of a mountain aficionado, I must say that Fuji might take the cake for my favorite...

Mind you that this picture was taken as I was driving...

As I got off the train, this happened. I have no words to describe it. Apparently the gentleman in the white is a captain of something. I think the people in the suits are gods or demigods of some kind. They were celebrating the first day of...I got nothing. They are advertising "Suica," which is a passcard that you can use on the trains. Suica is Japanese for watermelon. London has the Oyster card, Japan has the Suica. Why does public transit have to involve food items? 

On my way back, I was talking to my parents and I saw this...a parade of people over 50 (I suppose it is fitting that I am talking about bus schedules in the background). I recognized one of the guys in the crowd, but I can't remember where it was that I know him from. I only know like 100 people in a country of 100 million, and I can't remember where I have seen him before. For some reason, there was a marching band of children associated with this crowd. They were also wearing yellow, which may or may not be associated with the dancing stuffed animals and the captain dressed in white. 

Catchall Part 1

So I have a series of random stories that have happened through the last few weeks. I don't have any real good way to tie them together...here we go?

 First off. Japanese fashion is...terrible. It seems that most male fashion in Japan is loosely based on Jack Sparrow, but in an awkward way. Not this guy though. He evidently got into a Delorean that didn't have enough plutonium to get back to the present. You can see that he is wearing: Hammer pants, earing in the left ear, plaid, big Ray-Bans, bowler hat and a the tie to a fancy curtain.

 Thanksgiving was last week, I showed the kids how to make hand turkeys. We wrote all the things we are thankful for on the fingers. I have written sensei (teacher), tabemono (food), tomodachi (friends), and family (family). 

 I found this picture hanging in the hall at one of my elementary schools. The thing in the middle of the rice fields is my small elementary school.

 We get treats at the elementary school when the kids go home... I love the Engrish on the cookie. "The choice raisins are sandwiched in between cookies baked elaborately with fresh milk." Not bad right? I don't really know how you bake a cookie elaborately though...

 Thursday we had a fire drill. Odd right? I was interested in seeing what would happen. Such questions in my mind were "would the kids change their shoes before going outside" and "is this what the helmets in all the classrooms are for?"

 Consequently, during the firedrill, I was left pretty much alone in the staff room. Kind of eerie. I guess I was deemed "non-essential personnel."

 Yes, they do wear the helmets for this. The teachers put on the helmet and lead their students out to line up on the soccer field. Unfortunately for the kids, they were doing this in December...and it was raining. 

They are all into it. They cover their mouths as though there was smoke. You may be asking yourself, as I was, what the kids have on their heads. The kids are wearing their chair cushions on their heads...yeah. Awesome.

 Oh yeah, the tea lady was left to die in the inferno with me. 

 I just thought this was funny. Japan is all about jumpsuits. This brand makes me laugh.

 Today, I had the office manager come up to me and tell me something in unintelligible Japanese. The only words I caught were cafeteria and some pointing. I went to the cafeteria to find this. As near as I could tell from the sashes and the speaking, these are the student body elections. They wanted me to listen, so I did. I passed 3 levels of Angry Birds. Unfortunately, I almost missed the ending stand-up-and-bow.

 My JTE asked me to take over a class for her in the afternoon. We played an awesome game of Jeopardy. Things were going well for about 10 minutes until a student came in, mumbled, and all the students stood up and walked out. Naturally, I followed them down to the first floor where they were voting.

They take it very seriously. It was absolutely silent the room, and this kid would let them in one by one. Democracy at work people. 

In other news, I tried a Tim Tam Slam today for the first time. I was absolutely blown away. Tim Tams are chocolate covered cookie things from Australia. You can find them for a price here in Japan. A Tim Tam Slam is biting both ends off of the Tim Tam and drinking a hot beverage through it. I tried it with hot chocolate. The cookie gets soggy and starts to fall apart as you drink. Before it totally collapses, you pop it in your mouth and experience the best sugary snack I may have ever had. These are my new favorite everything. 

If You're Having Fun, You Aren't Learning

This wise saying is on the blackboard in the classroom in the movie "Matilda." I warn you now, much of this post concerns that movie, as I just watched it. For me, this was a movie that I have watched for years and years. It came out in 1996, and I would imagine that I have been watching it since then. I would have been 9 when it came out, but I remember watching it often because it came on TV. After watching it again, I realized that I can still quote the whole thing. 

Directed by Danny DeVito, I forgot how good this movie really is. I have always been a fan of Roald Dahl books (I feel like he should have had a penname...if you write children's books, don't have a name like Roald, get a name like Dr. Seuss), and this one always ranked high on my list. I find it especially interesting with books that we grow up with. For me, this was one of those books/movies. If you have never seen it, gather your kids (or not) and watch it. To this day, I have a hard time thinking of a worse villain than the seemingly superhuman and horrifying Trunchbull. 

This screenshot is during a part of the movie where she is chasing Matilda and Miss Honey...it gets me every time. It still makes me feel a little stressed that they are going to get caught. 

I posted on Facebook a few days ago that I felt like throwing 2 of my students into the Chokey, a device the Trunchbull uses for discipline in her school, Crunchem Hall. A few of y'all commented with your favorite lines from the movie and it stuck with me. I nostalgia-ed myself and immediately felt the need to watch it. 

Among the most notorious lines is the "You can do it, Brucie" line where a boy is accused of stealing chocolate cake and is forced to eat a giant cake in front of the whole school. I seem to remember thinking as a kid that I was like Brucie, and I could get fame and glory from my schoolmates if someone would just challenge me to eat a chocolate cake!

Look at old Brucie. You would be hard pressed to be that happy on a daily basis. 

On to Miss Honey. Miss Honey is the sweet teacher that saves Matilda from the wicked Trunchbull. Miss Honey (naturally she is sweet...get it?) and Matilda help each other and they live happily ever after. As a side note, the ending montage song is by Rusted Root called "Send Me On My Way" and it is one of my very best songs to brighten your day. I distinctly remember having a crush on Miss Honey at some point watching the movie growing up. Now that I am all grown, I can confirm that I have a crush on Miss Honey. As a plus, she has a really nice big old house that she inherits...so...there is that. 

90's fashion aside, doesn't she just look nice? 

(Immediately after posting this, I looked up this actress on IMDB and she was in Schindler's List as well as ARMY OF DARKNESS! Amazing)

I highly recommend this movie, and I am suspicious that this is going to start me on a Roald Dahl reading kick for the next few weeks. I guess that is good since I have 0 classes all day tomorrow because of testing. Serenity now. 

Sweet Saturday

Although I missed out on the Thanksgiving holidays, I totally made up for it with possibly the best Saturday I have had in Japan. Although it entailed waking up painfully early, it ended up being well worth it. I will start with the conclusion first in saying that I now feel a great desire to go to Brazil. 

 First, this is a picture of Fuji from a class I taught on Friday. Winter is a great time to see Fuji, I am told. During winter in Japan, there is less haze, smoke and rain, so you can see Fuji more often. I have looked at it almost every day for 4 months and I have to say that I am still not tired of it. It is a beautiful mountain.  Thanksgiving day also marked the 4 month mark for me arriving in Japan. I seems crazy that it has gone so fast, and so slow at the same time. I am now 1/3 of the way through my time here. 

 We started the day by playing soft volleyball in Minami Alps. I arrived 10 minutes early (which means that I was 20 minutes early because Japanese people seem to be chronically late) to find these older folks playing croquet out in front of the gym. They seemed to be enjoying themselves. 

 Getting ready for the game. It isn't traditional volleyball because we play with kickballs basically. It takes some getting used to. 

 This guy is ready to go! He was stretching and all sorts of stuff. Don't let this fool you by the way, it was absurdly cold in that gym. 

 Mid game. That little kid has skills. 

 The other cool thing about soft volleyball in Japan is that the net is like 6.5 feet high, thus making me a semi-professional. 

 We won all of our sets, until they switched teams and I lost. It was bitterly disappointing to lose, but it got better once we had a good team name. I named us the Subarashii Samurai (it means lovely/wonderful samurai). 

 I wore my track suit, and I. Look. Good. I felt like Tony Soprano all day long. I was missing some gold chains and murder charges, but I was close enough. 

 Afterwards we went to Brother Agren's house. He lives by this crazy overpass thing that connects a road straight down a cliff. I can't figure who thought this was the best solution...it looks like an amusement park ride. 

 We were having a legitimate Brazilian BBQ. I didn't want to get my hopes up, but I was looking forward to BBQ all week long. 

 We had about 25 people in a really tiny area, but that is how you do it in Japan. 

 Cooking the steak. I initially thought that we would run out of steak, but they just kept on cooking until every single person was full. We also had some deer steak as well. Let me say this...those Brazilians know how to BBQ. They dipped the steak in beer and salt before we grilled it. I love Japanese Mormons. 

 Brother Reme slicing up one of the top 5 sausages I have ever eaten. Evidently there is a Brazilian market nearby where they get all of this stuff. Incredible. 

 And what party in Japan would be complete without Karaoke? 

 Brother Agren (with the gray hair and glasses) has not one, but TWO karaoke machines! I sang a Somebody To Love by Queen. It wen't well. 

 The projector screen for the karaoke machine. 

I have no idea what these songs are about, I imagine love or something. 

 I have been to a few ward parties, but this definitely takes the cake. 

Folks sitting around chatting after dinner. It felt very comfortable hanging out for the afternoon. Despite the fact that there were lots of people crammed into a very tiny space, it felt like home. I guess I am getting used to the small space thing. I was full on steak and Coke Zero and sitting around telling jokes and laughing just like I would at home. 

Let me add this to my list of things I am thankful for: I am extremely thankful for people. I am very thankful for the church and the people in it. I am grateful to get to know these fine people, even though I can't speak to them. I'm thankful that you can get to know and love people without having to talk. 

Thanksgiving and a Sudden Fall Festival

Today, as you all know, is Thanksgiving Day. Being in Japan, Thanksgiving was just a Thursday for me. Luckily, I was at an elementary school. I was able to indoctrinate some first graders into the best part of Thanksgiving traditions. We made hand turkeys. We also talked about what we were thankful for. 

Some folks have commented on my only understanding 2 percent of wherever I am comment. While it remains one of the funnier things I have said, it is quite accurate. I realized earlier this week how many times a day I am surprised. Sometimes the surprises are good (like the one today), and sometimes the surprises are bad (like 1/4 school lunches). Not speaking the language or understanding the world around me, I get surprised a lot. I suppose that surprise volleyball games and choir festivals give the spice to living in Japan. Today I went to work to find an invitation on my desk written in Japanese and in crayon. I was able to deduce that it was for a Fall Festival being hosted by the second graders in the school gym...

 Included on the announcement was an advertisement for delicious pork soup (in Japanese). The soup was surprisingly good. Tofu, pork, potatoes, daikon and carrots. They handed me the bowl, but I still had no real idea what this thing was.

 I ate my soup happily because I saw everyone else eating as well. 

 Some parents came to help.

 This game was like memory. I played (and won) for the prize of origami. 

 He is getting ready to officiate the game.

 This was one of the coolest games. It was darts without darts. They had a felt bullseye on the wall, which you threw these little seeds at. I was hesitant that it would work, but these things flew straight and stuck to the target. I got a bullseye, which earned me a laminated card with fall leaves. 

 It was indicated to me that I could not participate in this game, which was a tunnel crawl. 

 I can't imagine why...

 These are the 2nd graders officiating the game.

 A very stereotypical Japanese pose. 

 You may thing that the person in between the two kids is another second grader. False. It is an old lady. She is extraordinarily tiny. 

 I didn't really understand this game. They just had me pick a stick out of a box. The stick I chose was covered in green tape. They seemed excited by that, so I got a prize. This prize was a collection of leaves on a piece of paper with a face drawn on it. 

They had bowling at this game. I didn't do as well as I would have liked to. This little boy in the red asks me every week to pick him up by my bicep.

 They are setting up the bottles for my performance in bowling. Spoiler alert: I did win a medal. 

 Fishing game. The fish had paperclips and you went "fishing" with a rolled up newspaper, string and a magnet. In the end, you could keep what you caught.

 Oh snap! There is my super awesome medal I won for my bowling skills...although it could have been an award for being the tallest person in the room. 

While you are eating your thanksgiving turkey and leftovers, consider that this was my thanksgiving meal for the day. Onion, seaweed and tofu soup, rice and sukiyaki with an egg roll. Not bad as far as school lunch goes, but definitely pales in comparison to a thanksgiving spread. 

As for Thanksgiving as a holiday, this one is very different than any other thanksgiving I have celebrated. This is potentially the only Thankgiving I will spend away from family and home. Being in Japan has shown me quite a lot that I am thankful for. I am thankful for kind people that I meet everyday, who are patient with my lack of language ability. I am thankful for the kids I teach, they are extraordinarily cute. I am thankful for my family and friends that make me want to go back to America. I am very thankful for America, and the great opportunity it was to have grown up there. 

Among all of the Occupy Wall Street things going on with the "I am the 99%," it seems like we perhaps lost sight of the fact that living in America at this time makes us all the 1%. We are blessed immensely in so many ways. I am thankful for the English language, and that I understand it. 

I have complained in the past about the Japanese garbage system, but I am thankful for it today. I went to pay my bills at the 7-11, so I got my bills and my money and set out. I was cleaning out my car of "burnable garbage" and I went into the store. After I went to the bathroom and was picking out a frosty beverage, I noticed that I couldn't find my bills or my 200ish dollars with which to pay them. I thought I left them in the car so I went out to check. When they weren't there, I retraced my steps and realized that I had accidentally put them in the trash bin. I questioned my resolve and determined that I would dumpster dive for 200 dollars. I did notice as I steeled myself for the plunge that at least 10 of my junior high students were watching me. I opened the cover and prepared to get up to my elbows. Here is why I am thankful...there was no garbage juice, banana peels or other nasty stuff because the trash is meticulously sorted. Also, the trash was recently emptied, so I didn't have to make a fool of myself. An odd thing to be thankful for at the end of an odd Thanksgiving. 

Happy Thanksgiving, enjoy your turkey coma!