Sometime last week, I received a notice of a failed delivery of a package. After rescheduling the dropoff, I got this sweet package of joy! My best friends, The McNaughtans, sent me a package for Christmas. They say that the best things are the ones that you don't look for (I don't know who "they" are...). I was super excited and waited all of 424 seconds to open it. Oops.
This is the package, clearly. I didn't get something from Banana Republic like the box would indicate.
Being the classy and creative individuals that they are, they included heartfelt expressions of friendship in rhyming form. I have included the full text here:
If you want to celebrate
Christmas in Japan,
and they say you can't,
just know that you can!
With Queen Anne chocolates
it's Christmas anyday!
A monopoly spa pack
makes a heavenly get-away!
And no more Flakey-Jakey's!
Muddy Buddies for you my friend!
Gum, jerky, candy and crackers,
the celebrations will never end!
The NBA is full of losers,
so play these handheld games.
And if you conquer both of them,
your future shows lots of fame!
Merry Christmas to you!
To a forever friend
but while our friendship is lasting-
This poem...well...it must end.
Now.
P.S. Speaking of things that are lasting
and your choice in men.
Enjoy some timeless music,
from the 90's way back when...
The P.S. was kind of a stretch to be honest...When did I mention my choice of men? I understand that it was necessary to set up the crowning jewel of the Clinton Administration. You know how I know they mean what they wrote? They put 8 exclamation points in the poem. I had heard that anything over 6 in one sitting is just gravy, but I felt the love pouring through the paper with the extra two.
The promised Christmas everyday chocolates...
Now I can make legitimate Muddy Buddies for the Christmas season.
I can hear the bells...
I imagine my Japanese coworkers will appreciate this.
The bus rides will be made less awful with this.
There's the money! Jerky baby!
Sweet, sweet Swedish!
Another rare ocurrance in Japan, peanut butter.
I am going to do SO many Tim Tam Slams out of these!
This is arguably my favorite part. The "Don't" in front of Go To Jail. Sage advice.
O-town. For the person who has everything...O-town is the gift of choice. Amazing! I don't know how they came by this treasure, or how they managed to part with it...
Thank you McNaughtans! You are the coolest people I know! I appreciate it a super-ton! I hope that my gifts to you were sufficient! Your family is adorable! Your present was great! I enjoy it! Thank you again!
(7 exclamation points...you are welcome)
