3 Rounds with the Devil

Today I came toe to toe with the devil. I am somewhat ashamed to say that I had to go three rounds with this, the hellhound of Satan. Though this is not a dog, I could see this thing salivating when it looked at me. I am not one to lose my mind over bugs, no matter what earlier posts may suggest. For some reason, the whole country of Japan seems to be literally crawling with giant bugs that wish to devour my soul. When I saw this spider, I almost lost my mind. I screamed quite loud, and I am glad that I have no neighbors to hear me.

 Doesn't seem super scary right? Just a friendly ol' spider.

 FALSE! This spider is the hellchild of the devil and an octopus. Look at that thing in relation to the size of my rice cooker. I want to know one thing, how long has this spider been living in my house and where are its friends?!

After 3 rounds of fighting, I came off the victor. I first poisoned it with spray where it retreated to behind the refrigerator. He tried to trick me into leaving him alone, but I fought in the legendary spider wars of 2005. I was not fooled by this ruse, and calmly awaited for him to escape into the open (I am not sexist in referring to the spider, I merely believe that there is no way that something so hateful could be a female). 

After he charged me for ground surrounding the garbage cans, I held him off with another bout of poison. Poison is slow to act, and is good for slowing, but not instant death. Luckily, I earned my stripes in the spider wars and can improvise freely. I took my lighter and created a jet of fire that spewed forth and licked all 8 wicked legs of the beast, rendering it dead. 

You can see the coin for comparison in the picture. That coin is a little bigger than a quarter, and that suckers legs were shriveled and charred. 

 Then this happened. My neighbor has left her porch light on for a few days which has attracted moths. Moths are a bit of an understatement because these things have fur. 

 3 together, the unholy trinity.

 There is a sandwich tie for comparison on size. 

Ah...on to something not so horrible. I took a discreet picture of first graders managing the lunch cart to their classroom while wearing their little face masks and covers. They look like tiny little surgeons.  

 Friday lunch. See that little pinapple looking mystery vegetable that I hate so much? Photographic proof. 

 For Friday night, we went to a little cafe in the middle of nowhere. When I say middle of nowhere, I actually mean that it is about 20 minutes from the middle of nowhere. I couldn't get back there if I tried. 

 The inside is very comfortable and homey. 

 The folks that own this had their own pizza oven made. Awesome right? In a country where pizza is rare, this is like striking oil. 

Another view from the inside. Someday I would love to have a rec room that looks significantly like this room. If I someday acquire this room and find a spider in it, I will burn it to the ground.